Sunday, May 20, 2012

Reading enthusiasm

I haven't been reading as much as I should. I've known this for years, but I can't seem to do anything about it.

Lately when I pick up a book, my attention is always divided. I can't keep focused on reading long enough, so I always break, bounce around the net for a few minutes, do something else, then read again. When I do focus, reading just doesn't give me the same sense of joy it once did. I haven't read anything that has truly enthralled me, gripped me, made me want to pick up another book immediately after, in years.

It wasn't always like this. Once upon a time I was an enthusiastic reader. I still remember gobbling up Sawyer's Quintaglio trilogy. I remember passionately diving into Garcia's Anonymous Rex series. I remember the sheer joy after reading Alice in Wonderland, and the mind-spinning feeling 1984 left me with. I remember being totally blown away by Rendezvous with Rama. I read books like these years ago, and after reading them I wanted more.

Now I read because I feel I have to in order to fulfill a writer's obligation to "read a lot, write a lot." I used to find time to read even while in the middle of a huge writing project. I haven't felt that kind of enthusiasm for reading in years and I can't pinpoint when I lost it, or why. Even after reading a good book (like Fox and The Hound, or the Moreau series), I don't have a desire to dive into another. Reading has become a chore.

I miss enjoying reading. Lately it seems nothing holds my interest and I don't really want to read anymore. I still write. Hell yeah, concentrating on writing is still going strong and I'm enthusiastic about doing that, but I don't enjoy reading in general anymore and this concerns me. I don't want to lose touch. I want that enthusiasm back.

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